#this is all just placeholder for myself if it ever happens

[sordidmusings]

Welcome🤍

Thank you for stopping by my blog! I hope you enjoy the clown show lol right now I'm keeping this chatty section real sparse to get this out but hoping to make it (and this whole list) more robust and comprehensive with time! One of the first things on the list is to have fic summaries instead of just titles and better formatting for multiple parts. At least this works atm haha For now, just know this is both a sfw and nsfw blog and nsfw will be tagged with #thirst hours

I hope the reading guides you on good daydreams and fantasies 💜

Daily click for Palestine

NSFW ☄️

Fluff 🌕🌖🌗🌘🌑 Angst (how much easy vs. harsh emotion)

AU 🪐

Non-canon elements in focus ✨

Tender Love and Care

Hair Care 🌖 Massage 🌖 Part 1 Part 2 and Part 3 - Coming Soon

Switching Up Roles 🌕☄️ Part 1 and Part 2

Loose Lips

Thirsty Thursdays ☄️

With Pissed Off Buggy With Lucky Brat Buggy With Insecure Buggy

Comforting His Partner on Their Looks 🌕

Age Gap Headcanons 🌕

Punk Buggy with a Tongue Piercing☄️ - Riff off of @hey-august's wonderful Punk Buggy

Let Go and Grip Me Tighter 🌖☄️

Mihawk struggles with guilt from the nature of his fantasies about you and begins pulling away. You won’t let that happen and both of you find the fantasy is more fun together.

Fixing What Ifs 🌗

Meeting with Mihawk for a drink wasn’t the most uncommon, but the bittersweet air certainly was. You’re swimming through memories of him, wondering at his feelings and intentions until you finally let your tongue loosen. Is this not enough for him either?

Well Earned Praise 🌕

On the heels of a hard won accomplishment, Mihawk shows you that he notices and cares. Just in his own ways.

How He Deals with Falling in Love 🌕

Jealousy Ficlet 🌕

Hickey Headcanons 🌕

Thirsty Thursday

The Hat Stays ON

Fireside 🌖 - coming soon

Bonding Exercises ☄️ - coming soon

Jealousy Ficlet 🌕

How to Break Rules 🌖

Jealousy Ficlet 🌕

Hickey Headcanons 🌕

Give (In) and Take (Me) ☄️

The Wrong Rest 🌑

Across the Great Divide 🌘 - Coming Soon

These Hoes Depressed 🌖 - Coming Soon

Brushing Souls 🌕✨

You've warned him just as much as the others how intimate and overwhelming it feels to touch another soul. Still, he's intrigued. Over time you've come to trust him enough to give him a taste of the soul magic of your home and he immediately accepts, equal parts eager and nervous. Nothing you said prepared him for all he feels at simply being surrounded by You. ~3.8k

Coronary Tale 🌗✨

Face Sitting ☄️

Hickey Headcanons 🌖

Eventually this will mean poly BUT for now it is where headcanons with LOTS of characters are until I have more fics under more characters (so Its not just a fuckload of headers all with the same fic under them lol)

Cuddling Headcanons 🌕 Straw Hats and the Three Unwise Men (Buggy, Shanks, Mihawk)

Cuddling Ficlets 🌕 Straw Hats and the Three Unwise Men

X Marine Reader Headcanons - Coming Soon

Straw Hats and the Three Unwise Men

Bonus Characters (Ace, Sabo, Law, Kid, Killer, Sir Croc, Doffy)

Sweetly Scented Secrets 🌕✨

These are ones I add to and build off of instead of it being just something for a one-shot. Currently a placeholder but wanna get posting for these soon! Gotta organize the massive thought dumps I have down first lol

Modern AU (Coney Island inspired)

Hybrid AU

ABO AU

On Their Feet - current priorities (Most have coming soon and up on Masterlist to kick my ass into gear atm lol)

Lifeline - in brain and touching on

Purgatory - letting them happen when they happen

Hell - uncertain if they will ever happen 💀

Random ass shit that doesn't have a spot yet wHOOPS

Now and For Always - One Piece Rendition

Andddd a reminder to myself to possibly link sketches eventually andjkjaskda

Enjoy the hot mess in progress LOL

[aayakashii]

I sent some ideas to Jeun-bug about how MC definitely had at least one GA student call them attractive or confess on wickhive and the ghouls going crazy but the MC thinking it’s just because they can’t believe someone would like them, and I just love the idea because my autistic ass would NOT be able to read through the lines of the tsundere helpless romantics or the more subtle flirts. Like, in text or games I can see it more clearly, but Jin’s way of flirting or even Sho’s? It’s go right over my head. Or I would catch part of it, but it’d be after the moment passed or I’d talk myself out of it. Also I’m just never sure about romantic stuff.

Jin giving me the dresses? He just wants to make sure I don’t embarrass him. He dances with me? I’m the honor student that can enhance stigmas, it’s a power play/im the only AFAB person that he tolerates here so he’s just doing what he needs to do as a public figure. He basically runs to protect me in the pit at the start of the Vagastrom mission? He was really there for Lucas or didn’t want to lose the stigma enhancement. He gives me a yacht for a mission? It was just for a mission, not for me really, besides, rich people have no concept of money. He quadrupled the reward to get the ghouls to cooperate? Again, rich people with no money consciousness, besides he is attached to darkwick and needs things to work out! Plays the Queen’s birthday song for my birthday? It’s the only birthday song that matched his tastes! Going to the birthday party I planned? It’s a “screw you” to Tohma, not for me. Wanting to know my dress? Well he said he would only potentially match, so ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Sho? I could definitely see myself starting to believe it, but then Leo would say shit and even though I know he’s a piece of shit, it would be enough to doubt it and I wouldn’t say or do anything without Sho being direct about it.

Haku and Rui I would believe it’s just a joke. They flirt with everyone, I’m not special. Besides, I’ve had guys flirt or ask me out as a joke before so it’s not a stretch to believe it happens again.

Kaito is desperate for any girl, not for me, so I wouldnt take him seriously.

Towa is obsessed with having a soulmate, but that doesn’t necessarily mean it’s me. I’d just assume I’m a fun placeholder until he finds the person he considers his soulmate.

Idk, just such a fun idea to explore!!!

👻

We are literally the same person, I physically cannot believe anyone would ever be interested in me and these are all the exact excuses I'd give to myself for each and every one of them 😭😭😭 I'd love to explore this idea, but I think I'd end up making it very angsty 💀 except maybe with Jin because he's so obviously whipped for MC that I think it could actually become a cute romantic thing

But like Haku, Rui, Kaito, Towa, Sho, all of these... oh I would write angst with a capital A 🧍🏻‍♀️

[agirlandherquill]

beautifully monstrous

all right, i'll more than happily admit that watching rots for the 20th anniversary did something to me - it finally, finally gave me the seed of a story i have spent so long, since Ruin's Reprisals first conception, wanting to tell. so, yes, this little prequel of mine might very well be my form of a love letter to the gorgeous tragedy of anakin and padmé, but it's also a tribute to the past that led to the stories my characters have faced, and are going to - so, without further ado, let me introduce you to the story of Maenaire and Thistlegrair, and I'm introducing this somewhat backward to you all, for the first snippet I'm sharing is of their story's ending - but I think it works best that way, as their ending is inevitable and it'll always haunt the rest of the story, but it's the journey that is just as important as the ending, and that's what I hope this story will give you all.

for now, it is a story without a title, but I'll give it a placeholder - Monstrous

“You were mine.” He whispered, his fingers gentle as they traced the freckles of her cheeks, following their curve to her jaw. “You were the only thing I ever loved. And even Death could not take you from me, because I stopped him. Because I could not lose you, I won’t. And now, I’ll never have to.”

She flinched away from his touch, a recoil so slight it was all the more powerful. “You really don’t see it, do you?”

“See what, my love?” The confusion in his eyes was an ache that would not leave her alone. 

“In the things you’ve done, it is you who have pushed me away, you are the very reason you’ve lost me.” Her throat burned as she forced the words out. “The man I love… I can’t see him any more. And that frightens me. It frightens me more than being without my heart in my chest. You are not him. You haven’t been him for a long time. I don’t love you. I am afraid of you.”

The little colour left in his skin disappeared in an instant. “You… You fear me?”

“I fear the things you’re capable of. The things you have done. The things that I have begged you not to do.” Guilt was her own wound to bear, and it had buried deep.

“Why-Why are you afraid of me?”

“I don’t know you, Thist. I no longer see the man I love. And it kills me. Every time you look at me with that darkness, that damned, wretched power in your eyes, it kills me!”

The confusion was swept from his face in an instant. His mouth twisted with rage. “I did this for you!”

Her own rage rose to counter him. “I never wanted you to. I never asked. I never helped. All I ever did was try to make you see that there was another way. You didn’t have to slaughter those people. You didn’t need to torment Death and his men - We could have taken my heart back. We could have saved me, and you, in a much, much easier way - But you didn’t even consider it, did you? The moment you learned you had power, you got greedy. You wanted more. What you had was never enough. And I couldn’t restrain you anymore. I’m not strong enough for that. But I am strong enough for this.” She reached into her pocket, her chest heaving with furious sobs as she closed the space between them. “I cannot save myself from you, but I can save everyone else. It will be my blood, my life, that will bind you. That will curse you for eternity for the things you’ve done. History will not remember us, and I beg it to forget. Because this will never happen again, do you hear me Thist? You will never harm another soul. I swear it, upon the sea and sky, upon the honour of the Haelish and Spire, and upon the name of my blood. I, Maenaire, of House Vitaire, will be your end, Thistlegrair of Saveirn. Let this be your punishment. Let this be your grief. Let this fit the atrocity of your unnatural crime.” She pierced his chest with her glass dagger, and hugged him close, letting her tears slip free down her cheeks as she cradled his head to her ear. “Let this moment be yours and mine. Let us remember who we were, and let us grieve who we’ve become.”

“Maenaire, no-” He gripped her tight, his body shaking, it was a wonder she was strong enough to hold onto him, but hold she did. She held him like she had never done before. Their embrace was tender, their embrace was torture, and she would never let him go.

“You’re going to sleep, my love. Always. I will not hurt you. I will not kill you. But this must be done. This is all I can do. This, an eternal slumber, is how I must make you suffer for the things you’ve done.” She twisted the dagger. “And this? This is for the lives you’ve lost. For the future we should have had together. Let this dagger bruise your heart as you’ve bruised mine, and bring you to slumber. Rest now.” She whispered, pressing her lips to his hair as his weight started to sag against her. “Rest, evermore, and always remember - For the monster you are, there is good to defeat it. And there is good somewhere in you, still, I know it. You will find it one day. Centuries may pass, times may change, but that good will live on. That good will grow. And that good too will change.” She sighed against his cheek, moving to press her lips to his, a final, fleeting encounter. “Goodbye, my love, and forgive me for this. Forgive me for failing. Forgive me too, for the things I have done.”

“Maenaire…” His voice was tired, he was fighting the dagger but not for very long, she could feel him slipping with each breath he took. “I love you.”

“And I love you - but sometimes…” She shifted to bear the weight of his surrendering limbs, his body was spent, his time was almost done. “Love is not enough.”

~ ~ ~

now for the tag list!

(p.s if you'd like to be included/notified too, interact with this post :) p.p.s im finally getting around to updating it, so bear with me :))

@humbly-a-doppelganger @imawholeassmood @frostedlemonwriter @yrndrgn @abditorywriting

@riveriafalll @lead-to-code @casualsuitturtle @floweryprosegarden @joeys-piano

@catwingsathena @godsmostfuckedupgoblin @nothoughtsjustmhaandotherthings @anaisbebe

@drchenquill @leahnardo-da-veggie @tiredpapergirl @pastelpinkhobbies @a-mimsy-borogove

@the-letterbox-archives @corinneglass @darkluminosity @kuebiko-writing @seastarblue

@aalinaaaaaa

[phlurrii]

Really hoping I am posting this at the right spot…

Hey there, loving your work, you got me to jump into the theory wagon out of sheer suspense. Here is my try at seeing what will stick to this massive theoryboard of mysteries~

Missingo went from a creature stuck to Meau's shadow to having a body/vessel powerfull enough to kill Palkia.

Which braught me to what vessel could be powerful enough to do so? Meau's first cub died somehow (stillborn? Necktube fatality?) Meau designed Bucket after the Necktube drama to remove the necktube. But a cub that predates or happened to die during that drama should still have the old blueprints of being bigger and having a necktube. Traits Noe physically holds. Noe being a prototype non-ancient mew baby could explain why he and Meau could exist at the same time.

But that leaves an additional questionmark on why their lifeforce are linked.

Which is where I bumped into theory two (the most probable one I think) in which Meau was so done with living that she tried to birth an ancient mew. But if the birth went wrong and the ancient cub died there could have been a glitch. The world must have one ancient mew. If Meau passed her lifeforce to the cub yet the cub still died both should technically be dead. But that goes against the laws of the world. There needed to be something to fix/ballance that glitch. Missingo could be the way the world tried to fix that mess. Missingo might have inhabited the dead cub and taken on a weird alive status of not quite living. And whatever ballance his manifestation created could have allowed Meau to wake up (a lot more weakened than an ancient mew should be but alive nonetheless)

Both are merged to the same lifeforce and function or count as a placeholder for one ancient mew.

Meau + Noe = one ancient mew. Cause of problem? = Lifeforce transference issue.

Why would the world chose Noe over deca? Probably becouse Noe was already present. Being at the right time at the right place. Or technically wrong time since he was way too early…

Basically the ingredients of stopping the whole world from imploding where already in the bowl so the world just mashed them all together into a weird yet functioning chimerical mush. What a way to recycle your resources.

Deca born all late because he became extra. When could this have happened? Why was it the domain of space that had to die? When and why did Noe and Giratina go rebel? My brain does not compute numbers very well. Not touching anything timerelated with a ten foot pole.

Anyways congratulations Phlurri, you got me to use the comment function on this site for the first time. Got me typing out a whole tower of text from the get go, have a good day~

First, let me say I am HONOURED to be the cause for your first even commenting, as a lurker myself I feel that XD

Second, 100% correct place, I LOVE these asks, but they definitely make me go dormant for a day or two in order to proceed and write my response carefully ehe

Anywho, ONTO THE THEORY!!!

To start off, Meau’s first cub did not die, Bucket is Meau’s first mew child. Bucket is currently comatose in a bubble in the Tree of Life. So I know that throws a wrench in the theory, but dw you have a lot of foundational things correct; just the bridging between points isn’t X3

As for the necktube stuff, Meau did create bucket without many of her own traits/characteristics due to her own experiences. She wanted to remove those issues from afflicting her child!

However, Meau specifically avoided EVER having a child until she felt she was mentally capable of raising one. Hence why she never had one in the nearly 4.5 billion years she’s been alive. Adopting? Sure, but raising a functionally immortal mew? Definitely not ready…. Given she was struggling a lot mentally with… things. So bringing a child into that mix was something she actively refused to do until those issues were no longer severely afflicting her. So she never attempted to have a cub, let alone an ancient cub, to remove herself from the picture.

But, I am genuinely impressed beacuse again, your foundations for things… are mostly correct, which makes me very excited to know someone can go through the comic and asks and get EXACTLY that,,, the foundations correct,,, meaning the rules and whatnot I attempted to put in place has indeed made it though in time for the Noe arc >W<

Noe indeed did not have a vessel and COULD not have one until a certain criteria was meant. Meau did assist in that criteria being meant, however his appearance was early and not how it was suppose to occur. It was a glitch, just like Noe is himself. The way he obtained a vessel… you’re awfully close, but it does not involve dead children I want to be clear!! Regardless, it’s scary and exciting at the same time at how close you are, I think one person (you know who you are.) may figure it out with the publication of this, but until then… I cannot comment further.

The way he obtained a vessel and comes into the world connects into how and why him and Meau share their life force. Though I will say, Missingno. cause the split, not Meau.

Also for the rest of time stuff you are too scared to touch, don’t worry, I spent 3 weeks figuring out how all it would work and then another 2 making. Digestible and simplifying XD

It will make sense, I have made SURE of it. As well as it will be satisfying most importantly. Very excited to be looser lipped about this all with how close it is ehe,,

Anywho, ty for your tower of words I quite enjoyed them and well DONE on the foundations, again that’s huge. Your skeleton is very close, the connecting tissues though would be hard to guess for anyone X3

[aquamine-amarine]

I've been having feelings all week. I still can't believe this cover is real, and the fact that they revealed it a week in advance. That's never happened before. Usually when Nakayoshi covers are leaked, they come out a few days before the issue is released, and it's usually a low quality image from Amazon Japan or BookWalker because they're finally updating their listing to replace whatever placeholder cover was there before. You don't get a nice high quality version until Nakayoshi updates their website/X on the day the issue comes out.

This time SC!'s official X account just decided to share the cover out of the blue. They've never done that before. What the hell is going to happen in this issue/chapter that they're sharing the cover a week early?! Or maybe the Nakayoshi Editorial Department (says right there in the profile the account is run by them) is just continuing their Amuto campaign, like that Palcy ad a few weeks ago. About time they started treating these two like their other iconic magical girl x magical boy couples. Took them long enough.

I love how excited Peach-Pit is about this issue too, it's adorable. I can't wait to see the color title page.

I frequently wander around the Japanese and Korean parts of the fandom on X, and they're also having feelings all over the place because of this cover. Some have wondered if this means Yoru will return.

I really hope that theory doesn't turn out to be true. As much as I like Yoru, I don't want him to come back. I would be really angry if they brought him back and ruined the scene where he went back into Ikuto's heart. That part was so well written and such a perfect end to their story, that it would make me really angry if they just undid that. There is no reason for Yoru to come back because Ikuto already achieved his dream of being a free stray cat, which is what Yoru represented. So it would only make sense to give Ikuto a new dream, which would give birth to a new Guardian Character. Still a cat, obviously.

What could this new dream possibly be? It sort of ties into my next point.

I've brought some of these points up in past posts, where I figured losing contact with Amu and Tadase would definitely make Ikuto worried. The phone confiscation policy is what made Rima freak out and drag Nagihiko to Arcana Academy with her. I had a feeling it would make Ikuto come back too.

Having been in a long distance relationship myself, this probably made him freak out more than Rima did. At least Rima is in Japan. Ikuto wasn't. When the only connection you have with your significant other is a phone and they're in another country, suddenly losing all contact with that person freaks you out and makes you anxious. They aren't responding to your messages. They aren't picking up when you try to call them. Did their phone battery die? Bad internet? Did something horrible happen? Are they in the hospital? Are they dead? Your mind goes to the worst possible place.

Amu's not answering so he tries to reach out to Tadase, but he's not picking up either. Two people he cares about, who should be safe together in school, aren't answering their phones. Even if Amu isn't answering him because she's annoyed with his weird messages, they should at least be marked 'read'. They're not. Tadase's messages aren't being marked 'read' either.

So either Rima (who has since become the captain of this ship) told him about what was going on because she figured Ikuto would want to know, or Ikuto called Tsukasa to get some answers. And this is how he learned about Arcana Academy.

How would these events make Ikuto give birth to a new Guardian Character?

Even though he was finally able to break free from Easter, I'm sure he still felt a little bit lonely. Yoru had been with him ever since he was a child, and now he's gone. His family and friends are back in Japan. For the first time in a long time, he was truly alone. He probably did feel a little bit homesick, but at least he could still text everyone. Not being able to be with the person he loves probably hurt the most.

And then he suddenly loses contact with her.

So in the midst of all this he gives birth to a new Guardian Character. Still a cat of course, but instead of being a stray cat like Yoru, he's more of a housecat. Which shouldn't be too surprising, he was already starting to act like a housecat around Amu, especially when he was staying in her room.

What does a housecat have that a stray cat doesn't?

A home. A family.

What else could he want? He already gained his freedom. He can do whatever he wants and go wherever he wants. He has a career as a violinist. The only thing missing is having a family and being with the person he loves.

The drama with Easter didn't just make him lose his childhood, he also lost his once happy, intact family. I think out of everyone in the series, Ikuto, Utau, and Rima long to have a happy family again (remember in Encore how Rima looked sadly after Tsubasa and Yaya's parents as they walked away).

So he gave birth to this new Guardian Character because of his love for Amu.

It would be an interesting trope inversion, because usually in other shoujo manga the girl's dream is to be with the guy - but here it would be reversed. Peach-Pit is no stranger to trope inversions - they did it with the amusement park. In other shoujo manga, amusement parks are usually happy sparkly date spots. In SC! it was abandoned, decrepit, and about to be torn down. The complete opposite of how it's usually portrayed. And they did go through with tearing it down.

So he loses contact with Amu and Tadase, gives birth to a new Guardian Character, and goes back to Japan once he finds out that they both transferred to a different school. The airport scene seems to have happened at the same time Amu transformed into Amulet Jewel Heart, so did the Dumpty Key change at the same exact time the Humpty Lock did? If so, he probably thinks he made the right decision to come back, because something is definitely going on.

I did have a theory about how Ikuto would be coming back, and while the teacher bit would have made a funny fanfic, I did also speculate he could just transfer in as a 3rd year high school student. Amazing how everyone in the Asian fandom forget that Ikuto dropped out of high school during his 2nd year. I always thought it was obvious that this is what happened, he did leave the country after all.

So he should be a 3rd year in high school at the same time Amu is a 1st year in middle school. So to me it makes sense. Not sure why everyone else is confused. Arcana Academy most likely has elementary, middle, and high school sections.

This could actually end up being wholesome, really. Ikuto can finally have a normal life as a student, even if it's only for a year. Before, he was constantly skipping and most likely was too stressed dealing with Easter's crap to enjoy school like a normal student. He had some friends, but he probably tried to keep them at a distance so Easter wouldn't threaten them too.

Of course he's going to help them investigate the strange events happening at the academy, it's the reason he came back in the first place. Because he was worried about Amu and Tadase after losing contact with them. But I really hope we also get to see normal school moments too. The first series was so fast paced and focused on Easter that they never had a chance to focus too much on normal school activities. So that would be nice to see, especially if we get some Amuto fluff out of it.

I swear I spent three hours writing this, I'm sorry these ramblings are so long.

[mydearestbeloved]

*Me seeing the idea of a bittersweet ending where reader implied to sacrifice herself and jinwoo ended up with haein instead*

I pretend I do not see /hj

now, I will try not to sound patronizing and I’m def not telling you what to do with your own fic but while I love that you try to stay consistent with the fic theme and how in-character it is for tp!reader to put others’ happiness above her in this hypothetical ending, if you’re gonna make jinwoo end up with haein in this “bittersweet ending”, I feel like you should give jinwooxhaein as much development as jinwooxtp!reader because I can’t bring myself to buy that jinwoo can be with anyone else but tp!reader after reading 20-ish chapters of jinwoo and her bonding with each other and sharing a deep connection unlike with any other characters and I haven’t even mentioned all the sacrifice tp!reader has made for our mc and how intense he reacts to anything that concerns her. It’s just not… believable? At least on Jinwoo’s side. Of course this is probably the case of being canon compliant but it feels like a lazy excuse and canon jinhae is already the definition of lazy writing to me.

All in all, making jinhae a thing in that ending feels really unearned and it makes the supposed “bittersweet ending” feel more bitter to me than sweet bc I believe in earning your own happiness. Obviously this is more of a "me" problem than you but I’m going to try and see what you plan to cook here.

Also did you know that the author originally wanted jinwoo to stay single but changed his mind near the end bc he wanted to attract more readers? It’s a sus information but it does make a lot of sense considering the lack of dynamic and development between jinwoo and haein.

I completely agree with your point—it is the more logical approach, and I have considered giving Jinwoo and Hae-In more moments in the story. However, I’ve been hesitant for a few reasons. First, I’m basing this story primarily on the manhwa, and my knowledge of the webnovel is limited. From what little I know, Jinwoo and Hae-In’s development in the webnovel feels more complete, and I don’t want to take away from what already exists out of respect for the source material. That’s why I’ve avoided webnovel-specific JinHae scenes—I feel like I wouldn’t do them justice because I haven’t read the novel. For the same reason, I’m hesitant to add entirely new JinHae scenes of my own because I’m honestly at a dead end when it comes to creating something that could stand on par with the relationship-building I’ve done for Jinwoo and Trial Player!Reader. Even trying to make it second place feels difficult. I’m still cautious about possibly butchering the story by forcing too much of something that might not fit naturally.

As for the bittersweet ending—it’s still very much an idea, a rough concept. The term bittersweet isn’t set in stone; it’s just something I used to refer to that particular ending idea, a placeholder. I realize now that this term might have caused misunderstandings, and I apologize for that! If we go by my original concept, this ending is indeed more on the bitter side but not entirely a bad ending per se.

So where’s the sweet part? Honestly, thinking about it now, I’m not entirely sure either. 😅 At the time, I envisioned it more as a cliffhanger—something that feels incomplete, where readers are left asking, How did this happen? This doesn’t make sense. That unresolved feeling was the vibe I was aiming for. That’s where the continuation idea comes in: the Guide AU in Solo Leveling: Ragnarok, which, if I ever write it, will bring the story to a sweeter conclusion—not just for the new main leads (Sung Suho and Guide!Reader) but also for the Trial Player AU’s main leads (Sung Jinwoo and Trial Player!Reader).

Even so, I’m fully aware of the challenges with this route too. For one, there’s the issue of Jinwoo and Hae-In’s marriage—how their relationship would be affected by Jinwoo’s bond with Trial Player!Reader. Jinwoo’s character doesn’t fit the mold of someone who would abandon a committed relationship, which would clash with the intense connection he has with Trial Player!Reader. There’s also the matter of Hae-In and Trial Player!Reader’s relationship and how they view each other. And so on. That’s not even touching on the complexities of developing a compelling romance between Sung Suho and Guide!Reader, not to mention how their predecessors’ history will affect them.

There’s so much that could go wrong with this initial direction, which is why I’ve chosen to focus on the current Trial Player AU and let things unfold naturally. Hopefully, as I continue writing, I’ll figure out a clearer path for the future. Maybe I’ll discover a new direction that resolves these issues—or maybe not. That’s why I’m calling this ending idea a rough concept that will remain buried until I feel more prepared to tackle it.

I honestly didn’t expect so many of you to take such a deep interest in the bittersweet ending concept. I’m genuinely flattered by how invested everyone is! Your speculation, honest feedback, and differing opinions mean the world to me. I’m so grateful—thank you so much for engaging with this story so thoughtfully. ❤️

P.S. Wait, really? Are you referring to the webnovel? Are you a webnovel reader, by any chance? It’s totally fine if not, but I’d love to hear more about how Jinhae’s story is portrayed there! If any webnovel readers among Trial Player AU fans don’t mind, feel free to share details about their romance. Not that I dislike reading novels—it’s just that I haven’t had the motivation to read the entire thing, so I tend to look for specific differences between the webnovel and the manhwa (which, let’s face it, are a lot), and that doesn’t make my situation any easier. 😅

[bloggingboutburgers]

First of, I'm a big fan of your work. I love your comics and art and was happy to hear about the engagement 😁

As for my question, I love writing stories and creating OCs/characters. In your recent comic you called out that the only ace/aro rep always seems to be "the creator said so on Twitter" (a problem with a lot of rep. in media).

So I was curious, if I wanted to create an aroace character (and write a story with them), how could I naturally show them being aroace? Do you perhaps have any idea?

Thank you so much for the kind words!^^

Arguably my complaints are ironic because I myself haven't done proper aroace rep in my own fiction thus far – though I guess I'm compensating for that with my current comics, haha 🙈 But also, I've said it before and I'll say it again cus I'm annoying like that – Bojack Horseman did it, in my opinion, so that gives the rest of the media less excuses I guess.

So, again these are my personal views, and they're possibly demanding, but this would be my checklist for ideal aroace rep:

The aro/ace character needs to... BE a character. Actually have arcs, that matter within the story. Whether they're about being asexual or not doesn't really matter as long as THEY matter as a character.

...Ngl I feel they need to matter BEFORE they're revealed as aro/ace too, and obviously after. If they don't, they'll just feel like a placeholder who's just there to tick a box to me.

The fact that they're aro/ace needs to be addressed and not pushed under the rug or left up to interpretation. Leaving things up to interpretation will have so many people interpret them as allo for sure (just like in real life). And conversely, saying they're aro/ace may spark some curious questions and possibly awkward conversations (just like in real life). (...Again tbh Bojack Horseman was great at doing it naturally. The confusion from the ace character themself, the ace character's friend assuming they're gay because yeah that always happens, the MC having a friendly yet clueless "haha you're lucky that'd save me so many problems if I didn't have sexual attraction"... I could go on.)

By that I also mean... Actually NAMING the orientation at some point. If it's not named people who consume the media and don't know such an orientation exists will be none the wiser. (I'm guilty of that myself tbh. In one of my webcomics I had an alloaro character but never had the orientation mentioned within the story, I left it at showing he has sex and him having a conversation with his family explaining he doesn't have a favorite person because he just can't, but I feel like that's not enough, and I've been feeling a bit bad about it.) A good way of bringing that up fairly naturally would be to have the character figure out their orientation within the story, as a way to have the audience learn alongside them; but it could also be played for drama, which I don't think I've ever seen and would like to dabble with myself at some point – like, imagine you have a friend you hold dear who's key to your personal development and suddenly you find out they see you as sex / romance prospects and not as a friend like YOU do? That'd be crushing but that could definitely make for a good conflict. I should try writing that. I'm rambling anyway. Bleh.

Another thing that, to me, is key to the aro/ace experience is that the character may have some moments of questioning their place in the world. Our world is obsessed with sex and romance and fiction exacerbates that to the point where some characters barely even exist if they don't have romance. This could range from "Do I NEED to even identify myself as something" (again, Bojack Horseman did that great) to "Friendship is the most important relationship to me but not to my friends, what if they all abandon me once they find the one person they consider 'more important'". I dunno. I feel like there could be some interesting storylines there. I definitely would love to dabble into that myself a bit more, though I lack the time and talent – those concepts and the lack of things that are done with it live in my head rent-free.

...Actually I feel it could be good to show aro/ace characters as full of heart (if it fits their personality), having their own feelings and emotions outside of the usual romance spectrum, to show that they're just as human and compelling as the other characters. (...AGAIN Bojack Horseman did that great imo, I feel bad that I'm only ever quoting that show but that's still the best example I can ever think of.) Like – betrayal, loneliness, grief, kinship, literally ANY other form of love than romantic love... We feel all of those too (aside from people who don't experience any form of attraction at all, in fairness), and those deserve to be addressed in stories just as much (if not more) than the pining or simping that's kinda everywhere.

Oh yeah and speaking of being human... Yeah, human. We need more human aro/ace characters. Making it so that only the aliens/gods/demons/robots/whatever are ever allowed to be aro/ace only serves to dehumanize these orientations.

...IIIII think that's it. I might be forgetting some things I'd wanna add on later but I think that covers everything that would make for ideal rep in my own opinion

[vacantgodling]

as stated, much of these are placeholder names, ideas, and concepts—this is just doing something fun for fun

chapter 1: the march hare runs

As March tore through the woods—she really had to wonder, what was wrong with this picture here?

She was a princess of Nectaria, one of the most prosperous kingdoms in all the land! And here she was, tripping over her own two feet, covered in mud, debris and even some of her own blood, trying to escape the shouting guards that had somehow caught up to her only a few days removed from her flight.

“I thought—” She huffed aloud, nearly missing tripping over an overgrown Glowtree root. “—That I had given myself—” She tripped over a second Glowtree root that had sprung up, deglowed, so nearly invisible in the dark. Face planting in the dirt, she didn’t even bother to finish her sentence, letting out an enraged huff that blew her messy hair out of her eyes. She planted her hands firmly in the ground, mud and clay squelching between her fingers, almost making her want to gag—the sensation was awful, to push herself up into an all-fours position.

“I think she went this way!”

“Get her!”

“Shit!”

March didn’t linger for much longer. She pushed herself back up to her feet, taking off downhill into the deep woods before her, praying that her tracks would be covered by the darkness that was ever lingering here; only ever illuminated by luminescent plants like Glowtrees and lumen flowers. She wasn’t sure how close to the border she was—any border, really. And that would be a problem. All of her papers and identification she left back in the palace, not thinking about it in her haste to just leave. If she was smarter, she would’ve left sooner. But no one thought that Princess March Hare of Nectaria was smart. They thought she was pretty. They thought she was kind. They thought she was a bit ditzy, or airheaded—and apparently that she… smelled good? That’d been the first thing to absolutely weird her out regarding her recently (forcibly, she would add) betrothed future-husband; the Prince of Doffensdu. He had taken a lock of her hair between his fingers, smelled it, and then with the most sickeningly disgustingly lecherous smile that anyone in all the lands could muster, he uttered that she smelled good. Divine, really, that was the word he’d used, but it still made her skin crawl.

Her elder brothers, Jan (short for January) and Feb (short for February—yes, with all 12 of them her parents had been remarkably original) had laughed at her. But they didn’t have to worry about marriages, at least not yet. They had been pathed to their militia and scholastic academies, since the two of them (unless, heaven forbid, something happened to them) were slated to become candidates for the next ruler of Nectaria, and they needed experience before their father stepped down from the crown and retired. But for the daughters and youngest sons? Oh no, it was all about alliances now—and as the third child, and unfortunate, unlucky eldest daughter—since the time she was fourteen, March had been introduced to suitor after suitor. Candidate after candidate. And frankly, if you asked her? They all were awful! Either too old, or far too young. Too boring, too plain, or too stuffy. Or, like the one her father had finally, finally settled on, too… weird! Everyone had their kinks and preferences to be sure; March was no prude, and she had a few of her own—but that’s certainly not how she would lead a conversation with someone she just met, nor one she planned to marry!

Regardless—she knew that her father wanted the best for her. She never doubted her father’s love—and surely in his mind, securing his eldest daughter’s future with a prince of Doffensdu was, on paper, extremely advantageous. Their kingdom was rich in ore and traded goods from the sea; being coastal, while Nectaria was located extremely far inland so it had access and was a hub for all the land trades. Having the two kingdoms combined through marriage meant an opportunity for more strategic and safer roads—things that March learned in her economic scholasticship, since her tutors knew she would be the most likely daughter to secure an advantageous trade marriage. And March had been fine with literally all of those things on paper. She knew her place as a princess, and she knew that just as people paid taxes, she was a bargaining chip for resources for her subjects.

But she just didn’t want to marry someone so… off!

Of course, she thought as she ran through the dim forest, tripping every few feet due to the low visibility, It is selfish of me to kick up such a fuss about this. Because she knew that many others didn’t have, well, the freedom to be spoiled like she knew she was being. And of course, she wasn’t only running away from this betrothal to a, probably decent man, just because he smelled her hair weirdly one time. Sure, he did make her uncomfortable whenever they were in a room together beyond that—though her sister below her, and closest confidant, April, assured her that she was just building him up to be some terrible guy in her head because she had a complex about getting married. Well, maybe she did! What was wrong with that? She knew that once she was wed that she’d be expected to perform…. wifely duties, and as a young maiden of just 23, that didn’t sit right with her!

March wanted to explore the world beyond the palace walls; educate herself in the lands beyond Nectaria’s rolling fields and bustling markets. Each new trinket that she could find from some far off place in one of the tiny corner stalls at the bazaar outside the palace, was another piece of the puzzle of the grand world just outside of her doorstep. But a queen couldn’t travel freely; she would be a kept woman, bound by duty, and state, and children, and more besides… and well. That terrified her! She was not so stupid to admit it! And so, she’d stolen out, just three weeks from her proposed wedding day, and disappeared without a trace.

Or so she thought.

She didn’t know what part of her plan went wrong. Did the note she left on her door dislodge? Or were there sightings of her among those in town? She wasn’t planning on staying away forever… probably. She did have a plan… One that did fall mostly apart after she lost her map in a swamp, was robbed just outside the kingdom’s walled border, and now this—stumbling through the darkness in mud and woods as she tried to put distance between herself and her captors. She needed somewhere to stop, to think…

And then—a stroke of luck.

March’s racing thoughts about all that transpired to land her racing like a little hunted rabbit through the forest, came to a screeching halt when she cleared all the glowing foliage and skidded into a clearing. All around her the trees loomed over the surrounding landscapes; their thick canopies obscuring light of the moon overhead; but the lumen flowers underfoot still bringing a soft shine to the surrounding wilderness. Not a single thing moved in this clearing; there was no wind in the grass or through the trees, no animals overhead or underfoot. Nothing but a chilling, eerie silence.

And in the middle of it all, stood a tower.

March stared, her thoughts quieting for a moment. Then they slowly began to churn, faster and faster as she slowly approached it. It appeared to be made of all manner of materials: wood, stone, brick, clay, terracotta, glass… harder to discern the further she peered up at the structure. The tower was narrow at some points…. but then March wandered around the base of it and it seemed to go around for miles at the same time. It took her nearly 40 paces to get around the length of the tower on one side, but that seemed far too wide for a structure that seemed so thin as it appeared. She couldn’t make out it’s spire, but she almost imagined that it pierced the clouds—if somehow the night swallowed it like it had.

A yell in the distance made her jolt out of her curiosity. Fear makes haste. So she quickly approached the base of the tower again, feeling around until she could try and find some sort of door or opening to hide herself in; at least for a moment. But no such door—one you could push, nor one you could pull, could March feel. In an act of desperation she began to test some of the sides of the walls, seeing if there were any pushed out or loosened stones she could use to grapple onto the side of the building, racing around the structure as fast as the panic in her throat would let her. But to no avail.

Except—she found something better.

Right as she was certain that the guards looking for her would descend upon her (as the noises in the woods as she searched the tower grew closer, and closer), she felt something coiled and sturdy, almost rope-like. What she didn’t see was the trapdoor that the “rope” had fallen down from as she circled away from this side of the tower only a few moments before. March only took a split second to make a decision: she had always been a decent climber. And now it was time to put those skills to the test.

March hiked herself up, wrapping both hands around the rope to begin to scale the wall free tethered. She could absolutely die if she fell the higher she climbed, but in her frenzied mind, it seemed better than getting caught. Until, suddenly, a snap sounded in the silence of the night; louder than any other noise that she heard near or far since she entered the clearing, and even louder than the sounds of the far off soldiers that would surely now come this way.

But it didn’t matter. Because with the sound of the snap, the “rope” unraveled only just, where March’s hands gripped it, ensaring her in its grasp and yanking her up the tower like a sandbag cut loose from a boat, and through the trap door whence it came, slamming shut with a thunderclap behind her, drowning out her startled scream.

[fictionkinfessions]

Oh.

I just watched through the new release and um. I’m still figuring out how I feel, I think.

Knowing that Till and Hyuna are both dead (I think. Hyuna is but- a part of me is still hoping- praying? Till might not be. I don’t know-) is-

Till. I’m so sorry. I tried so hard to get to you in time and I didn’t make it- I couldn’t save you. I’m so sorry. I remember the times when we did hang out, we had a lot of fun together (even if we did get into Shenanigans™️ /silly). I always enjoyed your company, even if I didn’t exactly love you in the same way you loved me.

Hyuna. There’s so many things I want to say. You saved me, in more ways than one. You saved me from the competition, and then you saved me from myself. You gave me a reason to keep going, something to fight for. Honestly, you became something like what I would call an older sister? In my canon, you also helped me explore my gender identity and realize I’m nonbinary. We did fight sometimes (or. Mostly me shouting at you, I guess.) but you were always there for me anyway. I’m so sorry for what happened to you, and thank you for everything.

Luka. I’ve met my Luka, so this is mainly aimed towards him, but it also goes towards any Lukas on here who might read it. Please don’t blame yourself for what happened. It wasn’t your fault. Towards my Luka, I have several memories (I think) of what happens in the future (which I’ve already brought up with you), but we’ll have to see. For what it’s worth, I hope that we both make it through this (I have a feeling we will, but- saying hope to stay safe).

Ivan. Addressing you because I feel like I should as well. Honestly, you were like a big brother to me. I always enjoyed spending time with you, just chatting about anything and everything. I know I was a little overenthusiastic/annoying as a kid, so sorry about that haha… On a more serious note, I’m sorry about everything else that happened to you, too.

Sua. I… There’s so many things I want to say, and yet the words evade me. I think I’ll make another ask later about that. Watching us as children made me remember a lot and,,, I just have this ache in my chest? I miss you so bad. I remember when I joined the rebels, I felt like I was changing and growing as a person, and all of a sudden, you weren’t there to see it, and I had to move forward without you by my side. It was the hardest thing for me out of all of it. I love you more than words could ever say or you will ever know. I’ll always love you. I miss you so dearly. I hope that if you’re out there, you’re happy. And I do hope I’ll be able to find you again some day.

I think what made me the angriest/most upset was seeing what could’ve been. What could’ve happened. We could’ve been happy, we could have been kids. We could have grown up and lived and not been forced into that damn competition. And yet that was stolen from us.

It was stolen.

I hate them for taking it away from all of us.

I’m wishing the best to everyone.

- Mizi, Alien Stage. #☕️☁️🏹

placeholder text because tumblr wont let me post ask messages without something in the reply box

[thequeenofsarcaasm]

Chapter 9 of Love is in the hands

Thanks again to @bearhaviour for inspiring 50% of the nastiness of this chapter and to @fah-keet for always encouraging me to take artistic decisions that will lead me to hell.

Summary

After getting kicked out of his home for being queer, Suguru comes across his childhood sweetheart in a strange gay bar that is owned by his new “family”: a bunch of queer social rejects who were taken in by Yuki, an eccentric matriarch. He finds a new home (and his lost love) there.

Glimpse

“I don’t think I ever made someone cum that hard and that says a lot for coming from an ex professional piece of ass as myself. Are you okay?” Satoru asks.

“Still a bit overwhelmed. I’m sorry,” Suguru says, feeling gross over the mix of cum and sweat covering his body. 

“It’s okay. I think I should be the one apologizing,” Satoru says with a laugh. Gently, he rubs a warm, humid towel over his partner’s bare abdomen to get rid of any trace of their previous activities.

“You were great. I just-yeah. You were great. Too great even. My skirt- Shoot.” Suguru covers his forehead with his hands and shakes his head. Suddenly his voice is tangled up again and his cheeks are wet, “I’m sorry. I don’t know what’s going on with me,” he sniffles. 

“Did my dick break my boyfriend? Did these people even pay me what I was worth?” Satoru asks himself aloud. But his attempt at humor is fruitless. Suguru can’t stop sobbing.

“Suguru,” Satoru discards the towel and pulls him in a tight embrace.”What’s wrong? Is it because of your parents?” he asks against his hair while gently petting it. 

“I’m fine. I just need a few minutes,” Suguru reassures in ragged breaths. What an embarrassing day for him. 

“Do you think tea would help calm you down?” Satoru asks. “Lavender maybe?” he suggests. His voice is so kind, so loving and his gaze so tender that the tears threaten to flow again.

“Maybe,” Suguru says.

Satoru collects his cum stained t-shirt and shorts from the floor and slips into them. Hopefully, he won’t meet anyone on his way. “Just give me two minutes. Okay? I’ll go fetch you some. Cuddle with my Kuromi while I’m gone. She smells just like me.” He leans down for a quick forehead kiss and walks out urgently. 

Indeed, Kuromi proves herself to be a great placeholder while Satoru is gone. Suguru fights against the cold by holding on tight to her, cradling her head like a human child. A few minutes later, Satoru comes back with his favorite mug, the one not even Suguru is allowed to touch, in normal circumstances at least. 

“Are you sure you’re alright?” he asks as he hands it to Suguru and sits on the edge of the bed..

“Yes. I-That pounding was for the books. Are you mad at me or something?” Suguru jokes. The mug is warm against his palms.

“I just got carried away,” Satoru laughs shyly. 

“Well, you might be a brute but you sure are great at aftercare. Thank you, Satoru,” Suguru says with a smile. The tears are gone.

“It’s the least I could do after making you cry. You were hot though. Super hot,” Satoru comments shamelessly.

His partner can’t help but chuckle. “I heard you the first time. You’re a sadist,” he says. 

“Can’t help it.” Satoru shrugs. “I’m not really normal about you,” he admits. “Besides, you’re not especially kind to my body either.”

“Can you remove your t-shirt and turn around for me?” Suguru asks as he places the mug on the bedside table and scrawls closer to examine Satoru’s back. He traces the red stripes with the tip of his fingers, earning a slight shudder from Satoru. “Does it hurt?”

Satoru turns his head to look at him. “Nah. It’s fine. I deserved it anyways,” he reassures. “You better trim those nails though. An accident could happen.”

“Do it for me later?” Suguru asks.

“Sure.” Satoru says.

The raven scoots even closer to him, pressing his chest against his back. “I love you, Satoru. With all my heart.” he whispers against Satoru’s shoulder, nuzzling him closely.

“Why so sentimental suddenly? Are you going to cry again?” Satoru taunts.

“I'm still dick drunk. Don’t mind me,” Suguru says. “Wait,” he perks up. “ Maybe I really am a cock slut.”.

Satoru claps his hands proudly. “Congratulations, you just unlocked the skill of self awareness,” he jokes.

‘Stop teasing,” Suguru giggles, more at the memories awakened by the clapping sounds than anything else. He rubs his cheek against Satoru’s freshly shaved undercut and leaves a little kiss just underneath. “ Hey Satoru,” he calls softly. “Do you think I should try something new with my hair?”

[momentswithmani]

“When Black Love Feels Out of Reach: A Lament for the Women Being Erased”

I never thought I’d reach a point in life where I’d have to question whether Black love is still possible for someone like me.

And yet here I am.

At 27 years old, in a world where dark-skinned Black women are constantly left out of the “happily ever after” stories—even within our own communities.

I used to dream of building with a man who looked like me.

Not because I was obsessed with the idea, but because it felt ancestral. Sacred. Intentional.

I wanted to raise children who knew both softness and strength. Who could see themselves in both their parents and feel fully seen in return.

But that dream?

It’s starting to feel more like a fantasy than a future.

And I’m tired of lying to myself about it.

⸻

The Truth Is: Black Women Are Being Erased

You don’t have to scroll long to see it.

Look at the couples being praised.

Look at the families being formed.

Look at the way Black men speak about us—if they speak about us at all.

We’re no longer the “first choice,” not even the expected choice.

We’re the ones who “hold it down” until we’re left behind.

We’re the ones asked to settle, to tolerate, to understand.

While whiteness, or proximity to it, is celebrated like a reward.

And it’s not just happening online. It’s happening in real life. I go out and see more and more Black men choosing everyone but us—and we’re supposed to just keep clapping from the sidelines.

I’ve watched this happen so much, I’ve had to ask myself the hard question:

“Should I retire my desire for Black love?”

Because what do you do when the very thing your heart longs for keeps skipping over you?

⸻

It’s Not Just Rejection. It’s Legacy Being Stolen.

This isn’t about bitterness. It’s about grief.

The grief of knowing that my features—the ones that get labeled “too strong” or “too loud” or “too much”—won’t be passed down unless I build with someone who honors them.

It’s knowing that if I want to see myself reflected in my children, I have to hope and pray that a Black man will see me as more than a placeholder on his way to someone else.

It’s the ache of being told I’m beautiful, but not choosable.

Spiritual, but not marriage material.

Worthy, but not worth showing up for.

How are we supposed to keep showing up for love when love rarely shows up for us?

⸻

“God, Are You Watching This Too?”

I’ve prayed. I’ve fasted. I’ve cried on floors most people never saw.

And still, nothing.

They say Jesus wept.

And now I understand why—because sometimes love doesn’t come, and you’re left holding a desire that feels like it’s slowly dying in your hands.

I’ve asked God to send me a man who reflects the very thing He planted in my heart:

Faith. Depth. Presence. Protection.

But instead, I get silence… or worse, counterfeits dressed in potential.

So what am I supposed to do now?

⸻

If I Have to Let Go… Let Me Mourn It Properly

If Black love truly isn’t for me—if I have to sit on the sidelines and watch it happen for everyone else while I’m called to “wait on God” indefinitely—then let me mourn what never had a chance to live.

Let me weep.

Let me wail.

Let me feel the weight of what I was told I could have… but might never hold.

Because pretending doesn’t heal me.

False hope doesn’t comfort me.

Only truth does.

⸻

To the Women Who Feel This Too

I know you’re tired of being patient.

I know you’re tired of clapping for love stories that never look like yours.

I know you’re tired of being told you’re “too much” while being expected to carry the emotional load for men who offer the bare minimum.

You’re not alone.

And you’re not delusional for wanting what your spirit still longs for.

But you are allowed to be honest that this hurts.

You’re allowed to say: “I don’t know if love will find me, but I know I didn’t deserve to be erased like this.”

⸻

Final Words

I don’t know what the future holds anymore.

I don’t know if God will ever bring me someone who sees me, chooses me, protects me.

But I do know this:

If I have to retire my desire for Black love,

then I will at least give myself the space to grieve it.

Fully. Honestly. Softly.

And maybe—just maybe—God will meet me there.

Not with promises. But with presence.

Because sometimes, that’s all we have left.

[my-castles-crumbling]

um so i came out to my mom two years ago and my dad last year no particular reason for the difference just happened like that and anyways they're supportive and all we talk about the girls i like over dinner or otherwise they still think i should focus on my education and think about my sexuality after i get into a good college or whatever but that isn't really from a place of homophobia. here's the thing though they're always like "keep an open mind bc you might not be gay" bc they think that the primary reason i like girls is because i go to an all girls school and have probably interacted with maybe fifteen boys outside my family in the fourteen years of my life and i mean they say they'll support me no matter what and i know that but at the same time i wish they didn't tell me to keep an open mind and shit bc my other friends who had interacted with less guys irl but a few online knew they liked guys even though they were in a girls school but my parents think most of the people from my school who say they like girls say it because we go to an all girls school but that's not the thing i've never really felt much attraction to guys maybe once when i was nine but never since then and if i think about a future with a guy all that comes to mind is one of those pictures you find on google of a stereotypical straight white couple doing shit together and i'm not even white so 😭 and i can't really ever picture myself kissing a guy fictional celebrity or real like i always use someone else as a placeholder but i can imagine vivid makeout scenes with girls so yeah i know with certainty that i like girls and not guys and my parents being kinda dismissive of it kinda hurts.

Hi!

That's so frustrating :( I feel like non-queer people say that type of shit a lot and don't understand why it's so upsetting. I definitely understand why you feel the way you do, and I'm so sorry <3

Have you tried to flip it back on them? Either saying, "Would you tell me to keep an open mind about being gay if I was straight?" or even (though this is a bit more sassy, probs not as good of an idea) "Oh, you guys should keep open minds too! Maybe you're actually gay!"

Naming you fearless anon

[beyourownanchor6]

20 Questions for Fic Writers

thanks for the tags beloveds @wikiangela @spotsandsocks @bi-buckrights @hippolotamus 🩵

How many works do you have on ao3?

—246

What's your total ao3 word count?

—1,469,436

What fandoms do you write for?

— 911, teen wolf, animal kingdom (not actively but still counting it)

Top five fics by kudos:

if i lay here, would you lie with me (forget the world)

nobody can do everything

i want to love you (but i don't know how)

five + 1 (idk who allowed me to name a fic this 💀)

someone to stay

Do you respond to comments?

—always! even if it takes me a few weeks, i always respond to them. i'm so so appreciative of anyone who takes the time to leave them 🥹

What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

—come back home (version 2) i just had to get it out of my system, sorry 🥲

What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

mmm, idk besides the one listed above and one other, they're all really sappy and fluffy endings 😅 it'll probably end up being whatever sappy ass ending i write for the chris doesn't come back au after everything i've put them through 😂

Do you get hate on fics?

—not really, more like just annoying people nitpicking stupid things

Do you write smut?

—i do indeed 😏 can't say if it's good, but i've got lots of it posted 😂

Craziest crossover:

—umm i write tons of au's but idk if this refers to that or doing an actual crossover with another fandom?? i wish not to talk about the one that still haunts me, but i did use characters from the step up movie for my au: let me lose myself

Have you ever had a fic stolen?

—not that i know of...

Have you ever had a fic translated?

—somebody asked once but idk what ever happened with that

Have you ever cowritten a fic before?

i have! 3 different times with my wife @loserdiaz 🫶🏻

—no body, no crime

—this is my idea of fun (playing video games)

—i don't want to keep secrets just to keep you

All time favourite ship?

—buddie! the brainrot for them has been unmatched jsiodj

What's a wip you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

—uhhh probably my divergent au...i've had the placeholder for insurgent with like 3 sentences sitting in my wip folder for forever 😬

What are your writing strengths?

—i'll just list the things people have told me because i have no idea sjwioe. i always get compliments on my characterization, descriptions, and metaphors <3

What are your writing weaknesses?

—shutting the fuck up and writing anything short 🫠

Thoughts on dialogue in another language?

—i've done it in the past but not really anymore

First fandom you wrote in?

—teen wolf

Favorite fic you've written?

—that's like asking me to pick between my nonexistent children 😭

i'm picking 3 idc

coastlines

if i lay here, would you lie with me (forget the world)

the ducking of evan buckley

tagging: @redlightsandicedtea @monsterrae1 @honestlydarkprincess @onward--upward @daffi-990 @wildlife4life @underwaterninja13 @bigfootsmom @thewolvesof1998 @eddiebabygirldiaz @elvensorceress @zainclaw @watchyourbuck @ronordmann @queerbuckleys @spaceprincessem @jacksadventuresinwriting

[howdy-folks-its-showtime]

It's Showtime! - October 2024 Devlog

Howdy Cobalt here! This is really late I know, that's my bad. Again. I want to say right away this dev log isn't particularly exciting. Mostly because almost everything I did this month was in preparation for future things to be added so while I may not have a lot to show… Hopefully everything I did this month will mean soon I will!

Got Cutscenes mostly working! There is a placeholder cutscene that's an intro and another that activates upon opening a door! You can skip cutscenes by holding E for a bit but I have not yet implemented the code that keeps track of which cutscenes you've seen before to activate it. [I want there to be a system that keeps track of if you have ever seen a given cutscene. Since this game is story-heavy I wouldn't want people accidentally skipping cutscenes that may have been vital. This system will hopefully be able to keep track of this even through save files. So if you decide to replay the game after fully beating it all the cutscenes will be able to be skipped since you already know what's happening and such. Also for speedrunners]

Okay I know there's not a lot here but the cutscene system took. A while and that was cause I wanted it to be as optimized as possible [we'll be having quite a few cutscenes after all~] And that always makes coding take a lot longer. If I coded it in a super messy complicated way it probably would've been done in a way but I wanted the code to be mostly clean and most of all not tank the performance. So it took a lot longer than I thought it would.

Been doing some loose writing here and there. Honestly haven't done any major writing this month, I wanted a break from it. I have since taken that break however and I'm sure I'll come back swinging!

Haven't done much art myself, been doing some tweaks to the props I showed off in the last dev log but nothing more than that. However I have been working relentlessly on Henry's first model [I say first cause I'm sure with time, I will want to update and change it] and I can say confidently it is fairly close to completion.

In terms of 2D art, I've done a few textures and Roddy has been working hard on character designs! We got one of the major characters in their cycle form done and that'll help a lot for establishing the style for the others ones as well. We don't have much that wouldn't be considered spoilers though so for now, you'll just have to trust us.

HUGE progress has been made on figuring out rigging. I have a rig that works really swell, [one that was created by that very person I talked abt helping me in last month's devlog] now I just have to learn how to modify it for my own purposes which shouldn't be too hard since I now know all the little mechanics that make it work. With that I can hopefully start on making a good generic rig for humans and toons alike to act as a base for all of them but still be able to customize for any deviations they have in design. This took. Days. But I think it'll be worth it when you guys get to see these characters start to come to life in their first few animations and such. I think next month, I'll have at least something swell to show off! Thanks for your patience as always!

[svollga]

I have been sitting with my feelings over s2 for a few days, and now I need to let it out. Before I can do the second re-watch, so it's all based on the first impressions.

Fisrt of all, I still adore this show, and am eternally grateful to the cast and crew and personally David Jenkins. It's great. It's great.

Second - this is a reminder to myself not to put my full trust into the showrunner, however good they are, however much I loved their previous product. They are telling the story they want to tell, and it's not always the story I want to hear, even if I liked the beginning of it.

That being said, I'm perfectly satisfied with how s2 played out for Ed and Stede. The story is there, delicious details and parallels are there, the ending can serve as a happily ever after placeholder. (But they need s3.)

However, I'm disappointed over some major developments.

1) What the fuck happened to Olu and Jim?

They were the second pining couple of s1. The one who got it and were only separated by circumstances. They spent as much time thinking about whether the other was dead as Pete and Lucius. And when they meet...

They're friends who each has their own love interest. That's all. (All there's on screen - that, and "family who fucked" later.)

Why was it decided, by the djenks and the writing room, not to go with textual and direct polyamory, giving them a romantic reunion *and* also new love interests?

Why aren't these new love stories more developed? All we know about Olu and Zheng is "the break of your day"; all we know about Archie and Jim is... Jim.

(I still don't understand who's Archie and what's her point, to be honest. I feel like Archie was needed as a love interest for Jim in the first three episodes for Ed to rage against, to put romantic love against his romantic pain. But after that, she's just hanging around for shenanigans, without giving us a reason why Jim is into her, or why we should care about her as an individual.)

But anyway, it could have been okay if we've been shown more of a transition from TealOranges to Jim/Archie with Olu as a friend. Or if Olu and Jim stayed romantic partners while also adding Archie and then Zheng. Explicitly, on screen.

For now, all three sets of relationship here feel underdeveloped. If they were short for time something should have been cut here and reshaped to give more space to the rest.

2) Seagull Buttons. My expectation was that Buttons will reappear in the finale in a manner that leaves the circumstances of his disappearance ambiguous (so we can wonder but never know if magic is real), and it would be a plot point. But he just... disappeared. It's set up without payoff. Even with a confirmed s3, it would be a hanging thread. Working in the framework of "this season could be last", spending so much time on the seagull plot without any actual payoff seems wasteful. (We could have had Archie's character development here! Or anyone else's!)

3) The big one. Izzy's death. I blocked all related tags as soon as I was spoiled (and had to temporary unfollow a couple of people - I'll get back when this all calms down) so I don't know much of the discourse and opinions. Just from my own impression, from watching this season one time, as it was coming out - this death felt narratively wrong.

It seems to be necessary to complete Blackbeard-to-Ed transformation and also to point to Ed that he's loved and has a family. The problem is, Ed isn't loved by the crew, and they're not his family. He traumatised them, and they've barely accepted him back. They're here for Stede, not for him. (It would have been different if we had an episode between 5 and 6 when Ed actually earns them back, reconnects with them all, finds his new place in the ship dynamics. Alas, we go from the cat collar in ep 5 to the party in ep 6 where Ed is included in the "captains", and then to him leaving and coming back again.)

Izzy's story stopped being about Ed and Blackbeard in ep 3-5. He got a leg; he made a shark. He found a family. He fonud an answer to the question "who the fuck are you?" He told Ricky that being a pirate means belonging to something - to the crew. That's where his story is, and that's what his finale should have been. He found his own ability to love, and he loved those people, and they loved him back. They should have been the ones saying goodbuy, and then promising to avenge him (which no one did btw).

The story would also work if he didn't die because it could have continue to be the story of love and self found late in life.

Add to this that his death happened accidentally. The very fact of him being wounded and dying wasn't related to anyone. He wasn't protecting someone, or attacking, killing for the crew. He just got a stray bullet.

This is all narratively wrong. It doesn't follow. I hope that I feel better about it after a rewatch, but it shouldn't feel so wrong after the first viewing. I'm pretty media literate, I can follow the narrative, and this one isn't working for me.

So here we go. There's so much I appreciate this season. I rewatched some scenes many times. But unfortunately, point 3 makes me sad and angry (because again, without this unnecessary death we could have more time for the plot and the crew), point 1 makes me angry because I miss TealOranges and wish for better poly representation, and point 2 is just annoying. I feel like I can't enjoy the show fully without retconning 3 and ignoring 1 and 2. Too much work at this point.

I hope to do a rewatch soon, and get back with the list of all things I appreciate. I just had to get this out first.

[bugsbenefit]

Who’s going to die in s5 and does anyone even need to die?

putting my thoughts on this out there now because i'm curious how they will hold up with s5 canon or if the characters that i think are narratively untouchable will bite it in the opening

because objectively, no, no one needs to die. not every story needs to kill off major characters to be "dramatic". strangers things has even gone out of it's way to avoid doing that since it’s first season. the characters that Do die are always ones that were introduced in the same season with the specific purpose of dying. Barb, Alexei, Eddie, all the vecna victims

they even skirt killing main characters, like how Eddie in s4 seems to be the placeholder for Steve since they didn’t want to kill him yet. there’s also interviews saying they wanted to kill him in s1 or 2 but then didn’t because they liked his character and wanted to keep him in the story. (also a fan favourite character too yk). similarly El was also supposed to die in s1, but even before st becomes a multi season show it's implied she’s alive right in the last minutes of s1

so while St sure loves killing people (see just how many people died in lab massacre 1 in 1979, lab massacre 2 in 1984, and the flesh flayer human meat incident) you’re pretty save as long as you’re a main character and survived your first season on the show

so s5 continuing with that and not killing any main characters is definitely an option, they don't need to kill. no matter how much the audience is waiting for "stakes" to be set, not every story needs to kill it's characters

on the other hand, there’s also a lot that suggests they might kill someone for real this time. challenging the perceived safety of main characters in the last season with a world ending stakes set up in s4 seems reasonable. there’s also the more theoretical perspective that we're in the final season now and there’s no coming back for any of these characters anyway, no matter if they live or die. the logic of making it to the next season that saved some of their asses before no longer applies

it would also make sense and not be uncommon for a story to kill someone important during the final installment to make it apparent how BadTM it is. most of the audience is also aware by now that the show isn't killing long running mains so changing that rule would serve the final season well (especially if it happened before the last 2 episodes and put people more on edge for the finale, now that mains apparently aren't completely invincible anymore)

so leading up to s5, I really think the chance of them killing at least one major character for real this time is the highest it’s ever been. the question would just be, who? and I don’t think I’ve ever seen anyone agree on this ever so I just want to go it over myself, get my thoughts on this out pre s5 spoilers rolling in. trying to evaluate how solid a build up for a death would be

going over various characters under the cut

there’s obviously some side characters that could reasonable die but I think would be the weakest choices, if not an outright joke at an attempt of “emotional impact” on the story

for example, they could kill Murray, there’s really nothing stopping them, but it wouldn’t be a very impactful death. the only one who has a real connection with him is Joyce. if they wanted to kill more than one character I can see them going for it, especially if they killed Murray earlier and had a bigger character die towards the end of the season. but otherwise, if he’s the only one dying it’d be funnily underwhelming. this also goes for Dimitri (depending on if he will be back for s5). easy to kill but would suck phenomenally as the only death

same for characters like Vicky and Argyle, who are both incredibly new characters so killing them would be very underwhelming. here with the added aspect of them both being minorities, and while you can obviously kill minority characters just fine, if they were the only characters dying it would look pretty bad compared to the 90% white and het cast that’d be alive. killing Vicky with her ongoing romance plot where they need to establish an entire relationship first would also be obviously stupid

moving to main and secondary characters of the show that have more significance. secondaries like:

Robin, who like Vicky and Argyle, would also be a weak choice. killing her at the end of her romance arc set up for s5 would be extremely unsatisfying in a way that doesn’t fit any of the shows themes. also again, killing just her would look horrible, and even if two people died, she’s been the public queer rep of the show before they officially had Will too post s4, would be kind of an insane choice to kill her

Steve on the other hand has much more merit to him. he’s the character we know the Duffers wanted to kill years ago and only held back due to the actors charisma and potential they saw for his story. and both of these points would be moot in a final season of the show. there’s also been enough foreshadowing of a death that would stand out on a rewatch and make it feel more planned. like the funnily long handshake he and Dustin have in s3 including Dustin stabbing Steve and him “dying”. killing him would also work to impact a significant number of characters as well as the audience since he IS a fan favourite. on the other hand, it would be a bit questionable to kill the other "guy that's close with Dustin" right after he had Eddie die on him. Eddie was a pretty clear place holder for Steve in s4, so killing Steve the season after wouldn’t be very different from a storytelling pov. but I could see them go for it, easy death, enough set up, potential to be upsetting, not whole show-vibe ruining

because compared to that, Hopper is someone I honestly don’t see dying at all. he not only had a full fake out death, the whole of s4 russia arc was about getting him back alive. if they just kill him anyways most of s4 will feel pretty pointless, especially after he’s Just at the point where he might see that he isn’t a curse on all the people around him. killing him would negatively impact his character growth AND fall flat with him already having died and come back right after. killing him fr right after he came back would honestly just be really funny, like, i don't know how serious people would even take it, i'd just expect him to come back again tbh

Joyce… is just kind of out there. killing her off would be brutal with how central of a character she is. her and Mike really were the two plot leading characters all the way back in s1 and her character seems to be a bit of a face of ST alongside with characters like El. it would also be rough on Will and Jonathan, like, character altered forever rough, so if she died these characters would have to change drastically. which would need her death to happen before the last two episodes if they wanted to do it justice. and killing her that early on would also feel odd with how much she’s a part of the core story. and of course there’s the whole deal with her just having gotten together with Hopper which should at least give her a few episodes of protection to explore that. overall, I think they could do it, but they would have to be insanely careful to pull it off well and I’m not sure it’s something they’d go for or something that's even possible to do well with only 8-9 episodes

Jonathan is someone a lot of people seem to think could die, but I also feel like a that idea comes from general lack of interest in his character. he Could die, yeah, it would also be interesting how characters dealt with it, but just like with Joyce, killing him off in the last episode would very much feel like a cheap kill for shock value since the strongest aspect of killing a character like him would be seeing the ripples it has over the story. and killing him would also put an extremely tragic end to his character arc which he hasn’t finished yet. he’s constantly parentified, steps back in favour of other people, he still couldn’t tell Nancy he wants something different than her for college, and so on. his s5 arc would have to focus more on his own growth over the series and accepting himself and his worth, so dying would be insanely tragic for him. again I feel like they Could do it, but it’s questionable if they’d be able to do it justice and not make it feel like his character is from a Shakespearean tragedy while everyone else is from a different genre

Just on reflex, Nancy is someone I don’t see dying. killing her would be really bold. all with her being one of the few women, and a character that's always been near the center of the story, and with her being the deciding party in the middle of a love triangle. but on the other hand, I could see some merit in killing her. she was the main leader in s4 and arguably already had her moment to shine when she shot Vecna (even if they still lost, it was arguably the most epically framed “win” moment of the season). she also finally got some closure on Barb’s death, ie. knowing Vecna killed her. you could also definitely argue that it would be interesting if Nancy was the one to ultimately die instead of the vision where she saw her mom, Holly, and Mike, dead (or implied to be dead, she doesn't say the word). so the longer I think about it, the more I could see a positive impact on the story. but it'd still be rough, and it would mean upsetting both Jancy and Stancy shippers by having neither have a happy ending, which, actually, would be kind of interesting, but I’m not sure the Duffers would go for

and then there’s of course the kids where it gets really hard imo. both based on the tone of ST and how it would be insanely dark

Erica is just someone I genuinely don’t think they can kill, ever. she’s the absolute youngest, also one of their 3 poc characters. don’t see any reality where she dies. they already didn't handle her character particularly well since her introduction so, no way they're insane enough to kill her

similar to my point about Hopper earlier, I also don’t see Max dying at all. she almost died in s4 during her initial encounter with Vecna, barely survived, and then got got for real and was dead pre El reviving her. her dying for real in s5 wouldn’t hit particularly hard anymore after she starts the season lost in some variation of a coma. her s5 arc already has to be about finding her, and presumably her dealing with the trauma of waking up. also whatever role she plays in the season, since we don’t know how many episodes it'll take before we can get her thoughts and actions again. killing her at the end would be kind of repetitive and absolutely fuck her character arc over since she just realized how badly she wanted to live regardless of her depression

El's character would also not have any benefit from dying, it would actively cut her character arc short, which has been a central point of every season up to now. her whole deal is learning that she’s not a monster that’s responsible for everything and figuring out who she actually wants to be as a person that can make her own decisions. her ending the series dying or sacrificing herself like so many people seem to think she will would be very weak writing imo. having her finally reach a point in s5 where she's free of Brenner, and guilt over what happened, and her het relationship with her boyfriend who doesn’t love her, and finally starts to realize who she wants to be, only to have her make the decision to die for the people she loves would just suck. it’d be compelling... if ST was a drama story and trying to tell a story of hopelessness. which is not at all what ST has been up until now and is also not what anyone involved has said s5 to be

Will is also unkillable without completely breaking the genre of the show. people are right that him dying in s5 would be full circle to s1. and showing the inevitability of the UD killing him after all and how he couldn’t get away would be fun sure, but it’s not stranger things. aside from actors already having said Will gets some form of happy ending, killing him just wouldn’t work. everyone was trying to get him back alive all the way back in s1. him eventually dying after all is a cool concept in theory, but it doesn’t work with the show at all

Mike is also hard to kill. with Byler happening, it would be insane to kill either of the two parties right after having them get together or confirm each other’s feelings. Mike is one of the characters with the most consistent allusions to something bad happening, especially in s4, with the whole set up of “hasn’t unpacked yet”, jaws poster, “death count is going to rise”, and Nancy’s whole vision about him presumably dying, but it’s much more likely he just won’t have a good time in s5, not die. he already had a fake out death as far back as s1 with the cliff, so if they want the show to go “full circle” they could just have him almost die again, or have someone Think he died for a bit. perma killing him just doesn't work with the mleven to byler arc they set up for s5

Lucas doesn’t have any death flags and there would be no benefit in killing him. killing Will for example would at least be interesting on a meta writing level if you disregard the genre of the show, but killing Lucas would just… feel insanely unjust, he's just a kid who already went through writing fuckery in s4. he also almost lost Max, and his s5 arc seems to be very focused on her and helping her. killing him off right after Max survived would just be plain bad. do not see Lucas dying in any reality

And Dustin is my "if they had to kill a kid". there Are some lines you could definitely catch on a rewatch post death that would make it feel less out of nowhere, be it the “if you die I die” said to Steve, or Suzie talking about Dustin feeling like it could foreshadow a death. Dustin also doesn’t have the protection someone like Mike has, where he’s in the central gay childhood best friends to lovers plotline

overall, I think Vicky and Argyle are essentially guaranteed to be fine. there’d be not much emotional payoff for the audience and only the killing of the few diverse characters of the cast. Robin would also be hard to kill without making it look weird with her just introduced romantic interest. Hopper and Max are too much “been there done that” to die for real. and the kids dying would at best seriously derail the expectations the show set until now and negatively fuck some of their character arcs over at worst

so. tldr, my thoughts on this: killing Joyce is possible imo, but extremely hard to do justice. similar sentiment about Jonathan, even more so bc it directly conflicts with his character's core struggle. killing Nancy would probably be the most interesting choice to go for, to me, if done well, but it’s something I don’t really see happen in the show. Steve seems like the most likely choice to die since he’d be a pretty easy kill, the audience and a significant amount of characters like him so it would have impact, there’s enough death flags to make it seem foreshadowed… would just work really well. and if any of the kids died it would have to be Dustin imo, even though I’m still of the belief that they won’t touch the kids when it comes to killing characters

also, Murray's just a free kill to me, not impactful enough on the characters to fully derail character arcs but still with the show long enough to be a bit sad to see go. if they’d kill only him it would be a bit wasted because it would feel like a copout of killing an impactful character, but if they want to kill a primary character and make stakes higher by killing someone else, Murray is the easiest to turn to for that, especially if they want someone to die in the earlier episodes

and this is just about the "main" characters (as a broad term here). characters that could also ofc die are other kids parents, police officers we know like Callahan, other side characters like Mr Clarke or the mayor. but most of these would not really have much impact on the story and would pass more as casualties along the way

the Wheelers are a bit of an in-between here, because while none of them get regular main character focus and don’t even know about the UD, they still come back every season on a personal level and have the most solid characterization out of side characters. Karen even has a noteworthy character arc, which none of the other side characters have. Holly will be fine honestly, Ted is really just there, not much screen time, i don't really see much benefit in having him die, if he did it would most likely have to be in passing or in mass casualties. so Karen would be the one I could realistically see be compelling to kill. as a side character I’d put her on a Murray level, where she’s consistently on screen and everyone knows her but she’s not really someone people would be upset for days about

the Murray treatment also goes for someone like Owens btw, where I could easily see him die as a side note (not as the main death). he's been with the show for a while but doesn't have enough impact on the story to really force you to keep him alive. there's for sure info we can still get from him in s5, but after we have a full picture of what happened with El and Henry at the lab and how Owens was involved there's really nothing keeping him alive as a character

and everyone's done, wall of thoughts over!

that’s where I’m at with all the characters as of now, especially from looking at their past arcs up to s4. I’m just really curious how this will hold up with the actual s5. Maybe they’ll just go in bold and kill someone I would have said has a 0 chance of dying right away, who knows who knows